Rebecca is the self-confessed best looking and most talented member of our group. She often reminds us how lucky we are to be associated with her, but at the same time, keeps us in check by maintaining a minimum 3m 'Zone of Exclusion' around her person when we are with her. After the end of a long day, we must take turns bathing her feet with lemon scented biodegradable cleansers, making sure we get right between the toes. We must also write and recite odes of poetic appreciation devoted to her glory. As a group we understand that these tasks are privileges for which we are truly blessed.
Rebecca Facts:
Age: Youth
Height: 6 ft +
Likes to be referred to as: 'Her Gorgeousness', 'Little Miss Fucking Beautiful', 'Rebecca Cindy Crawford'
Often heard saying: 'If I donated 1% of my beauty to you, you'd be a thousand times prettier... don't get your hopes up though, I ain't donating shit.' 'You didn't just touch my beautifulness did you?', 'My god you're ugly... and that's not even compared to me,.. you're full blown hideous', 'Between the fucking toes!!!'
Ailments: Mingingitis, Mingingococcal
