About a year ago, Andrew confessed to the group that he was in fact white. This came as a complete shock to us. He was embarrassed and ashamed, and had withheld this truth for fear of ridicule within our peer group . There may have been some substance to this as we do not often let type of his persuasion in. We weren't sure how we missed it. We just figured he was a big, hairy, fair-skinned Asian. I mean he was good with chopsticks, ate mostly Oriental, and is an Accountant. What more is one to think? Part of his ruse, was the fact that he often applied margarine to his skin before heading out in the morning, in order to conceal his natural skin colour. Be that as it was, he was retained as his usefulness, ability to part a path in a crowd and proficiency with numbers, outweighed his negatives (white skin flakes). The only precaution that must be taken with Andrew is when one is bent over in front of him if you're a guy. With girls there is no such problem
Andrew Facts:
Height: 6ft +
Weight: 100kg +
Odour: Musky
Often heard saying: "How much is it? Where can we get it cheaper?"
Net worth: £10.5million
